How To Fuck Your Psychiatrist by Basil Papademos

  • ISBN: 9781504501422
  • Written by: Basil Papademos


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The new novel from Basil Papademos

Funny, filthy and flagrant!

Jump on for a red hot ride

through a twisted tale of…

love, lust, madness & motorcycles


He’s a happily schizophrenic, madly romantic motorcycle freak.

She’s a scalpel sharp, highly accomplished ─ if slightly unhinged psychiatrist. When the courts order Villon to undergo psychiatric assessment, of course he ends up with Dr. Kate. If love and madness really are the same thing, what could possibly go wrong?

Funny, flagrant & fast-paced, How To Fuck Your Psychiatrist is filled with a cast of wildly hilarious freaks and fiends, including Villon’s sexual predator girlfriend, Ren, his pal Dogman who communes with evolving canines, the pathologically optimistic Spike, and a trio of wise-ass escorts Villon faithfully drives to their dates. Written with a disarming emotional honesty, this is the story of lives spinning beautifully out control in a world full of raging ironies…

Here are what the reviewers are saying:
“There’s sweet, then there’s dip your fist in sugar and punch someone sweet.”
-Mel Bossa, author of seminal LGBTQ novel, Split

“The sex is unsparing and incredibly lush. It is a love story, in the sense that being honest in the portrayal of human passions and complexity without passing judgment is the essence of love.”
-Margaret Wagner, Amazon

Warnings: This title contains graphic language and sex.
Word Count: 74,000



The Corner Office


So, as good fortune would have it, Andrea’s bed is higher than average and just right for one of my fave things. Well, it’s one of everybody’s fave things─or should be─the Corner Office. It’s a variation on the corner of Doctor Kate’s desk. Truth is, there’s a lot more control when you stand and fuck a woman than if you’re on your knees between her legs on a soft bed. In fact, tables and desks are made for the hottest kinda fucking. A perfect example is a scene near the beginning of John Boorman’s Excalibur.


A really hot bad ass black knight has a scorching, fire eyed hard-on for the dishy young blonde of another knight or maybe she’s a princess. Either way, I think she’d already eyeballed him at one of those Let Us Rejoice type Joust & Meets. She strolled her pussy past the rakish knight and gave him one of those winsome So… do I have to take a number or what? sorta looks. Problem is this little blonde minx is promised to someone else so the black knight’s not supposed to bang her but, hey, the guy’s a black knight so screw the rules and he collars Merlin and browbeats him into whipping up the power for him to ride across the waves to a grim medieval castle overlooking some stormy fjord where the horny young princess lives.


The cruel and demonically sexy black knight tells Merlin, Fuck riding around the bay on terra firma. What do I look like? I want me and my steed here to thunder across the crashing whitecaps and through wild lightning and smash into her chamber and slam the mother lovin’ ass off her. It’s gotta be balls to the wall magick madness or fucking forget it─and you, Merlin Chrome Dome (cuz Merlin wore this weird silver skull cap), are gonna make it happen or you’re gonna have to deal with this here massive broadsword being jammed up your wizardly ass. That is how bad I gotta have this babe. Catch my drift?


So Merlin does the hocus pocus and next thing you know, the black knight has this very hot young blonde with the creamiest skin laid out at the corner of one of those massive rough hewn tables. The black knight still wears the top half of his suit of armor and hangs onto her ass with his chain mail gloves. Very pervy. And the princess; Man, she is snaky sensual, just writhing, and so into their fucking. Easy to see why the black knight would slaughter kin, kith and kingdom to get a piece of her action. Now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure she begets King Arthur, hence all the magickal mambo. Well, considering the kind of powerhouse fuck her and the black knight get down to, you gotta believe something pretty impressive is gonna come of it. If the black knight had ended up lying between her legs in some big spongy canopied bed, it would have been totally anti-climactic, really feeble. She probably would have given birth to a halfwit.


So Andrea lies on her girly bed with a couple childhood stuffed toys propped against the headboard. She’s supine and smiling, looks so cute in her lingerie and it takes her by surprise when I grab her by the ankles, lock my elbows behind her knees and haul her butt down to the bottom corner of the bed so I can stand on the floor and do the black knight trip, have her splayed beneath me. And goddamn everything for a thousand eternities if this isn’t one of the hottest angles you can see a woman from. Fuck porn. Porn is bullshit. This is pure analog 3D in-your-face mystery and magick.


I unhook a five-foot long stainless steel leash from my waist and clip it around Andrea’s neck, wrap the other end round my fist. It’s a perfect alignment, mechanical and aesthetic, and this is where all the yoga classes she’s been taking pay off─scalding hot core abdominal strength so she can spread wide without a lot of support and curl up toward me to watch our heat. Truth is, you can try all sorts of positions and plenty can be fun but for my money, the Corner Office is very tough to beat. Nobody ever gets sick of fucking this way. Okay, so it’s not always apropos right off the bat but if you’re short on time or already in one of those wham triple bam thank you fuckin ma’am moods, the Corner Office is the way to go.


There really is nothing like looking down at a girl as she blooms and blossoms, impaled on my burning hard-on, giving up huge ideas as they unfurl from her mast of unconquerable fire, heels hard against my chest grinding into my nipples, kicking my shoulders, and everything she surrenders explodes from liquid flaming eyes. I can’t get enough of it. I can’t think enough about it or talk enough about it or jerk off enough to it. I can never exist enough just knowing about it.


Current Reviews: 1

This book was added to our catalog on Friday 04 December, 2015.

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